The Parents Are Largely Not To Blame

By Mubarak Ibrahim

Our worldview or ideological foundation is warped. So this man sees no wrong in being at daggers drawn with his next door neighbour who reprimands his child for doing wrong. He sees no wrong in allowing his daughter to dress scantily for a friend’s wedding ceremony or, being taken for a “visitation” by a boyfriend. If a family friend or brother frowns on that, the mother would be the first to attack him for attempting to sabotage her daughter’s chance of getting a husband.

A colleague says that unless we let go our anti-intellectual culture, we could not crawl out of this abyss of retrogression. I think we do not even have such a uniform culture to go out of today. What we have is rather a confused phantasm of a life which was born out of our frantic effort to “glocalise” the global so that we fit in the modern world. Yet we ended up in social chaos, identity crisis and moral bankruptcy. So, are we to go back or keep going?

Our worldview is today being warped by the abject poverty we are living in. This man at Dorayi quarter, Kano, confessed in tears to have allowed his daughters to prostitute themselves in order that they win bread for the family. He made the confession at a community gathering organised to warn him of his daughters’ illicit business. People cried as he narrated his tragedy. My brother was there.

Ninety-nine times out of a hundred we find it difficult, largely for poverty reasons, to control our boys and so they lead a carefree life; truanting, watching uncensored movies, accessing Internet, wandering off our radar, taking drugs; and in ghettos, smoking all smokeable things, thieving and hoodlumming. Take, for example, the corrosive effect of some Television stations on our youths today. It is very dismaying. I believe they are turning Arewa upside-down. They are furtively changing the worldview of the youths and our women at home. Their programmes are so affective that youths today never dream or aspire to be Professors, scholars or just responsibly and morally reasonable in our definition of reasonable. Today, being a rapper, singer, actor, dancer or Deejay (disc jockey) is the highest achievement in their world.

No wonder you find new eateries, nightclubs and partying centres being opened everywhere in the north with big speakers stationed at the entrance and inside. From a mile outside, one can hear music blaring out. Girls in scanty dresses trooping at the entrance and, when inside, dancing “kerewa” alongside shameless guys as in Ekwensi’s Lagos of “People of the City”. Some are puffing on Shisha and romancing in dark corners. That’s how they spend nights today in the north. All are, I believe, resultant damage of Television stations that help Kannywood’s satans spread their televised devilry.
These Stations have to be monitored by a capable body in the north. Today, the stations are bastardising the youth’s delicate thinking. There are fanciful programmes that are systematically produced to counter our culture and religion. This way our dreams are murdered. Yes, as youths bother more about inanities, our future is doomed.

In comparison, my father once told me that they birthed more children than us but they were able to control their movement, educate them and give them food. I told him that that was when “to eat was not a problem”. Our worldview is warped by the government’s nonchalant attitude towards our lives. We no more look up to the government schools, hospitals, electricity and all other basic life necessities. So we live a beggarly life. Frustration kills one when he or a member of his family is sick. No hospital in Nigeria. Even the president had to go abroad for medical treatment. We buy everything here. He who has nothing dies untimely.

Still the government can not take all the blame, they say! Moreover, In this confused, dreary life, they call that this dejected poor man should abstain from sleeping with his lawful wed wife, (the only remaining pleasure within his reach) or spend a fortune to buy or take contraceptive pills/measures.

Mubarak Ibrahim is a budding writer, radio presenter and an enthusiastic teacher of Literature.

One thought on “The Parents Are Largely Not To Blame

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