Many nowadays parents are obviously ignorant of the tasks before them.
Society is actually suffering from the ignorance of such couples that start the business of child bearing without adequate knowledge of how to raise them.
I often tell people that parenting is beyond just the material provisions for a child, that is just a part of the very many and major aspects of the business.
It is not enough for you to be able to afford the best school for your child, when you will be absent physically and emotionally, to check the moral growth of that child.
The challenge of some parents is not even that they are absent, they themselves are ignorant of what acceptable behaviour is.
I once saw a post on my younger children’s school platform. A parent was advising women to stop sweating before their children as if they were in the labour room, and I said to myself: many parents must be guilty of this.
Once I read a sad post on the social media of a book in a school library titled: “My body is growing”, a guide for 4 to 8yrs old children. What is growing in the body of a 4-year-old child?
A preview of the book talks about romance and intimacy between children of opposite sexs, with pictures that should be for only adults. Now, what would a 4-yr-old child need that training for? It is a different thing to educate the children on the need to watch against adults who may want to take advantage of them, rather than teaching the children how to start practicing sex.
The importance of proper parenting comes to bear here, where we don’t leave the training of our children to their schools alone.
Successful parenting is not about age, it is about experience gathered to help build a child of acceptable character and attitude in the society, and the ability to put the experience into good use is key too.
With good parenting, I trust that we can overcome the prevalence of moral decadence in our society.
The nature of our economy mostly demands both parents to work from dawn to dusk, and in many cases, late into the night.
According to the World Bank collection of development indicators, Labor force, female (% of total labor force) in Nigeria was reported at 44.23 % in 2021. This is a very significant number of women in the society, and of course, we know that a good percentage of their husbands, if not all, and if all the women were to be married, would be working also.
Therefore, most times, parents have to leave the responsibility of parenting into the hands of some house helps and, sometimes old grannies that no longer have the strength to discipline these growing ones.
A worrying angle to the issue is that of some Nigerian films and movies that could pass well for Blue Films; and I wonder how such movies got through the corridors of National Film and Video Censors Board, NFVCB.
These movies do not promote good character in our children, and they would still be rated 13. Movies that should not be aired in the first place.
It is important for all young parents to note that raising children is a business that must be carried out wholeheartedly, and nothing can be allowed to mar the success of it.
If you mean to raise children that will be good members of the society and not the problematic ones, you must be determined to live by example. It is impossible to give out what you don’t have. Learn some good attitude and use the right words before your children always.
Never abuse them, or even abuse your spouse in their presence.
If you raise your children in love and care, you’ll enjoy the fruit of it when they grow to become parents themselves.
Apart from all these, there are also some measures that can help us out of these menaces of moral decadence in our young ones, and the society at large.
I, therefore, recommend the following:
No marriage should take place without both partners undergoing a period of parenting training and lectures.
Churches and Mosques should have periodical teachings that dwell basically on building the next generation that will sustain our cultural values.
There should be seminars for young couples, where they will take refresher courses on an ideal parenting method.
Churches and Mosques should form a forum of young adults from age 17 to 25 where relevant subjects and activities that will help them develop into better persons, will be addressed.
Government should review educational textbooks and ban anyone found liable to promote immoral acts in our young ones and the society too.
The government should do a thorough check and place a ban on Nigerian films and movies that could pass well for Blue Films, and put a check also on NFVCB to ensure they do their job.
Government should also establish forums and institutions where existing and to-be parents can go to seek more knowledge, and even speak to experts.
Introduction: I am Shalom A. Oludele, writing for Elanza News, as my contribution for a better society, which is what we all look forward to.
This is my own little way to say: I love my father land.
Good Luck Always. Jesus Saves.